Category: Let's talk
I need advice. I have to go with my family to Cape Cod tomorrow. I don't really want to go at all because it will be all sight seeing mostly except for going to the beach for a few minutes. I just hate it! They treat me like a freaking five year old and I'm twenty! It's like I can't even stay home by myself because "What if something were to happen?" What freakin if!!!! I just can't bloody take it anymore! What should I do? I just can't stand going somewhere where they don't even talk to you and it's always like, "Oh look at that cute house, Oh that's so pretty!" Oh my God it sucks! Aaaaahhhhh! I'm so frustrated! And I fuckin have to sit in the back of the car with the dog! Holy crap! I'm blind, not five!
Simply refuse to go along unless they will allow you take your trumpet with you. Then take your trumpet and play on it the whole way and the whole time. I am sure that after this vacation they will BEG you to stay home. Star
I get treated like a child to and I am 26 not 6. People just don't understand how it is for blind people.
I suppose i was one of the lucky once and my parents didn't treet me like a kit the most of the time. But i think some of the times it's up to the blind person to try and explain.
Like when i said i wanted to go to England and study at first they didn't like the idea of me going abroad to study far away so i had to go on and on about it to make them understand that this was what i wanted to do.
Now they are proud that i can mannage on my own in a foreign country.
But what i want to say is that there isn't a button to press and change their oppinions from one day to another. It requires a lot of work.
Nikos
Heheh, Star, I like that one. Personally, I love family vacations, but I'm a real dork that way. I suppose taking off and doing your own thing while you're there isn't an option? Just tell them you're going to grab a coffee, and go explore by yourself for a bit? Definitely don't put up with the sight-seeing trips if that's all there'll be. Even if you're not comfortable taking off around town alone, you could just spend the day on the beach, or find a coffee-shop you like, take a good book and chill out for an afternoon. Remember, you're 20, an adult, and you don't need supervision. It's not unreasonable to want some time alone on a holiday.
Good luck,
Erin
One of the problems faced "growing up blind" is that family members don't kow what we are and aren't capable of doing. Frankl, neither do we, but w need the opportunity to find out. I agree with the last post in that trying to do something on your own for a part of that time is an option. Going to the coffee shop with a book on CD, cassette or MP3, bringing a radio. This way, you're making a choice, and yet going to "quell their fears" of what you might do on your own at home for awhile. another thing you might do is to focus on the smells and sounds and other sensory stimuli around you. I tend to evesdrop on other conversations, listen to the music of other people's radios, smell that coffe shop or deli or the salt air, etc. Good luck, and let us know how things turn out.
Lou
Its up to you to prove how able you are and as for the oh look , it's part of life mate. I have had to live with my climbing mates going daft over the view, however I've learned to accept it and enjoy the fact that I am able to be there on the summit, instead of whinging at the bottom. Nothing will change unless you make the effort.
It's pretty much up to you to explain things like that to your family. They won't know what bothers you unless you tell them, and they won't know what you're capable of unless you tell/show them. Families tend to be way overprotective by nature, and you have to make them realize you don't like that, and that you're capable of doing stuff on your own.
I hate to say this...We live in a sighted world, so most sighted people are obviously sight oriented. I used to just live with it till I moved 1000 miles away, and had my own life, and developed my own morals. Then, what could the family do when I was home if I refused? The old excuse that I couldn't be alone didn't hold any water anymore. Good luck to you.
I would say you should explain your predicament to your family regarding vacations. Having said that, I completely agree with you. I realize we're in a sighted world and I get along really well in said world everywhere except on trips. Where sight seeing and tourist attractions are involved, I don't get much joy out of them and no one can understand why!!! So good luck and sympathies.
Blind people are at least half the problem not the "sited world"
hmm...where to begin?
at risk of sounding catty, all i have to say about them worrying about you being homealone is that clearly, they have a reason to doubt your abilities? i mean, i myself was left home alone since i was twelve and i know plenty other blindies who were left alone at or around the same age.
having said that, i agree with earlier posts in that you should try to do something on your own or simply talk to your family and tell them that it's no dice with the sight seeing.
a last alternative is one i perfected on my parents. when they would say things like "look at that?" i'd say "ok, either you want me to embarrass us all by tresspassing so i can get close enough to look or you're gonna describe things to me."
amazing how that worked...they're very good at telling me stuff now.
Hi you guys! And thanks for the great posts! I am home, and the family is sight seeing! I talked to them, and they understood, yay!
Fantastic! Now, enjoy the solitude if that's what you prefer. You can practice all hours if you want. I know that's what I used to do.
Lou
see? sometimes all you gotta do is speak up! the worst thing that could happen is them saying no, but i'm sure they probably didn't realize the affect it'd have on you.
I reckon you should talk to your family about how you've been feeling and if they don't take you into consideration and lighten up a bit, I'd go exploring on your own...here's wishing you luck.